Humble Pie

Stepping away from the Gratitude Challenge for a moment, a few related thoughts and ideas are on my mind right now.

People that know me know that I do not have children and don't intend on having children. It certainly isn't because I don't like kids or  hate them or anything crazy like that.
I absolutely adore children and love my work with children who need a little bit of help. Children aren't just part of the plan for Josh and I. Having said that, I think that parents have a tough job in the world. I don't know how they do it on a daily basis. Sometimes a couple of hours with a child or two exhausts and frustrates me, but at the same time I can find such joy and happiness in those same two hours. Maybe that's why parents do it. Maybe that's how they do it.
In my job, I have the privilege of partnering with parents and their children who need a little help. Most days come and go without a hiccup. Then there are some that leave me speechless and heartbroken. Today for a brief while, I didn't know what to say or what to do. A few of my kids are currently in pediatric wards for serious illnesses. I went to visit one of them and his mother today. I knew he had become sick but I guess I wasn't prepared for it. He had numerous tubes attached to him, including a vent so he could breathe. I am used to seeing this bubbly happy baby boy; not this baby. I nearly cried when I saw him, but I didn't cry in front of Mom. I waited until I got to my car. It just made me sad.... and guilty. Guilty simply because I complained earlier in the day that I didn't sleep well last night and here was this momma who has hardly slept in over a week because of how sick her baby is. I don't know how she has done it. I guess because she has no other choice but to be there for her child. The strength that it takes to do what has to be done when a person's child needs help.  I have been told that a parent just does it because they have to. Maybe that's why I don't have kids. I don't have THAT kind of strength. That is humbling.